Let us celebrate Earth Day by planting a tree, or recycling, or taking a train ride out to Rafiki’s Planet Watch, belching diesel exhaust all the way.

It is a pretty sevenish minute ride on the Wildlife Express Train, where you can view behind-the-curtain magic like Animal Living Quarters.  And, if you were to look behind you, you’d see Animal Incinerators.  Hey, it’s a park with a lot of living things in it.  Sometimes those living things die.  Sometimes, there are smiling cast members greeting you at the front of the park.  Sometimes, there are smiling cast members backstage with a shovel.  Sometimes, daily park cleanup includes scooping up and tossing into the fire.

Anyway, where was I?  Oh yes, Rafiki’s Planet Watch.  This section of the park is separate and isolated from the rest of Animal Kingdom, as you can only get there by train.  This area includes a lot of education, interactive elements, and a petting zoo.  Therefore, it appeals to and attracts children.  Lots and lots of children.

The place is packed full of young people that ate and drank too much at the Tusker House Character Breakfast.  Eventually all that milk’s gotta come out.

Pop Quiz, Hot Shot:  How many restrooms would you need to have in order to accommodate these thousand or so kids all in one isolated section of the park?

1. One
2. Two, located at the two train stations
3. 42
4. What’s a restroom?

The answer: one.  One!

The restroom, located at the entrance to the Conservation Station, is a logjam on busy days, and still an ordeal on slow days.  Plus, it is easy to overlook as you run past it to get to the interactive stuff.

The cast members here must hear “Where is the restoom?” more than anywhere else in the entire World.  Even worse, the closest restroom is a train ride away, located in Asia, and that one is not much better for crowds.

So please, take my advice.  Before boarding the Wildlife Express, take a leisurely stroll through Discovery Island and visit one of two restrooms there.  Even better, stop for lunch at my personal favorite, Restroomosaurus.